Punching bag

Sometimes you are the puncher and sometimes you feel like the punching bag.

Apollo has been obsessed with karate ever since we watched Karate Kid for New Year's Eve. I waited almost a whole month to enroll him, just to make sure it wasn't after-movie euphoria. (Besides, we had 3 or 4 years worth of hand-me-down soccer cleats carefully packed and labeled, waiting to be used). But karate was calling, so we signed him up, and have patiently watched him kick, block, and strike his way through his first belt. He loves learning all the moves and the self-defense excercises; I love how they encourage goal-setting and discipline. He had his first test a week or so ago, and although everyone passed (they make sure everyone is prepared before they test them), he was really nervous.

But boy did he feel proud when he got his new belt!

It doesn't always work out so well, though. Last week Paris tried out for a travel soccer team. He is always one of the better players on his rec team, but then, there are a lot of kids on rec who just started to play. So we thought we'd expand his learning with some paid coaches and more competitive play. He has such a passion for soccer, and he never gets tired of playing it, we thought he'd be a shoo-in for sure. But I couldn't help trying to prepare him for rejection, just in case. "You know, if you don't get in, it's okay-- you can play rec, we'll look into other leagues..."So many of my try-outs and auditions ended in dissappointment when I was young, I couldn't help feeling that sense of doubt creep in with the nerves and excitement. "What's the matter, Mom?" Paris finally cut me off. "Don't you think I'll make it?" And with that I suddenly felt ashamed for even putting out the possibility of not making it. I tried to explain that it was my self-doubt, not to worry, he would surely make it.

But after two days of grueling try-outs in a balmy spring that suddenly turned into a punishing summer of 90* days, and then waiting and waiting and waiting for the call...it seemed that my doubts were warrented after all. At last the team was posted, and in a trembling voice, Paris told me, "Mom, I didn't make the team"...and my heart sank, as I tried to help my personal soccer hero grapple with the lows of dissappointment. I must admit throughout the weekend, waiting more anxiously for that call than I have for any other (and I have had my share of waiting for calls...from waiting for boys to waiting for jobs), I had had my share of tears and prayers, carefully hidden away from my hopeful boy. We had refrained from putting Paris in travel soccer in NJ because all of the games were played on Sunday. When I was struggling with this in NJ, I felt a promise from the Lord that my kids would not suffer from choosing to keep the Sabbath day holy, and yet now he wasn't good enough? It was a tough weekend.

The list was posted last Sunday, after the sacrament speaker had talked on this talk from General Confrence, and as I tried to comfort Paris, I can only have faith that this dissappointment will reveal new opportunities and growth. Maybe for me as much as for him.

Spring Break 2011

This year Spring Break seemed like it took forever to get here. All the snow days we accumulated in January resulted in no breaks until Easter week when finally we could get a chance to get away, visit my sister who just had a baby, and visit some sites in southern VA that we never made it to when we lived there.

We did Williamsburg in a day and made it to all of the buildings, played games the settlers played, and a few even got locked up!

So then we went to Busch Gardens--tons of cool, scary roller coasters! We went upside down, dropped straight down, had the track above us, went 90 mph--basically did everything but fly! Apollo is just not quite tall enough to ride the biggest rides, so he got one on one time with Mom or Dad, while the rest of the family stood for hours in line...and so he got the most pics taken of him, too.

Here is three of the kids before they went on Escape from Pompeii (one of my favorites):

Here is after they got off:

Mom and the kids on the pirate ship:

The next day we went to Virginia Beach. We rented a family bike and rode up and down the boardwalk. We all took turns driving, and it was good to see who we should let wait to get their drivers license! This was way more fun than I thought it would be!

Then we spent a windy day at the beach and looking at light houses:

The next day we spent wrapping up loose ends at Busch Gardens, riding our favorite rides again, buying souveniors, seeing the birds and wolves:

Then onto Richmond to vist Alyssa, Jeff, and Abigail. The kids LOVED seeing a baby cousin, Apollo especially--he hardly let her out of his sight, and read to her, and even changed her diaper.

We had a great time as usual--we decorated eggs and had a great Easter dinner before they sent us on our way home with a gorgeous Easter basket.

Groupon Made Us Do It

When we were in the midst of the worst of moving, I came upon a groupon for a zipline in Boone, NC--about 2 1/2 hours north of Charlotte. I thought why not? What a great family day trip! And so I bought 6 half-price tickets for Scream Time Zipline. And then I have fretted about it ever since...Apollo is so scared of heights he hugged the walls at the lighthouses we visited and won't get on Brian's shoulders. But we made reservations and drove up there this Saturday. So beautiful! And what do you know, Apollo was the 3rd across! (Paris, of course, was first) We had a great day, and we'll be looking for more groupons in the future!!

Sharing the Remote Control

After having Brian be gone 5o% to 75% of the time during the last 13 years, I think I can safely say that I can survive without him. I know where the emergency shut off valves are, and how to flip a breaker. I've gone down to dusty, dirty crawl spaces and pulled down attic stairs. I can juggle 4 kids schedules and get the oil in the car changed. I learned to sleep alone in a king-sized bed. I became king of the remote control. I got dinner on the table most nights, but we ate off paper plates to cut down on the dishes. I became the tutor, the disciplinarian, the parent so tired at the end of the day that all I could do was yell from the couch to GO TO BED. And I convinced myself that really, this wasn't so bad. Look how efficient I can be. Look how capable I've become. Look how every weekend becomes a honeymoon, reunited.

Brian has been home now for 2 months, with one overnight trip. I admit that having Brian around more was a huge plus for moving down here. But it was also a huge concern. What if I started taking him for granted? What if he took me for granted? What if we annoyed each other? What if I couldn't share my remote or the bed for longer than 48 hours? What if he came and messed up all my carefully laid parenting plans?

But really, as much as I tried my hardest to be everything, as many soccer games as Brian took the kids to to reconnect, as many phone calls and e-mails that flew across America, I am finding that shouldering the day to day together really does have intangible benefits.

Like, teaching Apollo to ride his bike. Apollo tackles challenges a little at a time. Learning to ride in one weekend session was not going to work with Apollo. But 5 min. here, 15 min. there after work, in a few weeks, Apollo was pumping away.

This is Apollo--estatic

And then, a few weeks ago, Brian heard about Video Games Live, an interactive musical show that played music from video games and had live actors and laser shows, on a ride home from work on the radio. So Tritan dressed up as un-dead Mario, and they went on a Daddy-Son date, right when Tritan was having a particularly bad week and really needed a boost.

Tritan--estatic

But it is the day to day things that have really affected me. I serve dinner on real dishes, and even garnish them sometimes, with the anticipation that someone besides me will find Persian Walnut Chicken or Chicken-Ham Lasagna appetizing. And then, Brian can pick up Athena from dance or run the kids to mutual so I can clean up dinner sometime before 11pm. He picks up items from the store on the way home! He leaves early on R.S. Meeting nights so I can go without feeling guilty about Apollo's half-done math sheet! He builds IKEA furniture in his spare time! He calls me for lunch dates! And most nights, I still have energy to climb the stairs and read Apollo a story before he goes to bed. And if someone has to yell up the stairs for them to GO TO BED...his voice carries a lot more gravitas.

Yes, there is a lot more laundry. And a lot more ironing (why iron when you just have to pack it?)--and there could be a lot more incredulous gratitude for the ironed clothes like--"Oh, my goodness, I can't believe you ironed all my shirts! That must have taken a good hour at least! That's amazing! You did this for me! You are the greatest..."only here he gets choked up at the sight of all those ironed shirts and has to turn away. That could happen more.


But getting kissed every morning. Snuggling every night. I'll take that over earned air-line miles and supreme control over the remote any time. Because I'll never get tired of that.

Did you know that letters and numbers are people too?

"O is a boy," Apollo said last night while I was helping him write his report on Alligators.
"What?" Who is O and what has this got to do with alligators?
"O is a boy," he repeated, and then pointed to his paper, "and A is a girl."
And immediately I knew what he was talking about. I couldn't help but get a little excited. All my life numbers have lived a secret life inside my head--5's were jolly fat men with top hats and 4's were their cranky, skinny wives; 3's were their precocious naked toddlers and they lived in the number 20; 1 was a skinny old wrinkly man; 0 was a magician; 7 was a rebellious teenager that grew up to be the wise and noble 49; 8 was a sexy lady of course, though 64 smelled like lipstick and carried a patent leather handbag...well, you get the idea.
However, I have never anthromorphized letters. So I was very interested.
"Why is O a boy?"
"Because he's just plain, and a has a ponytail."
Makes sense to me.
He went on...S's are snakes (of course), B's are butterflies....
t's are dads, standing with their arms out...e's are talking with their mouths open....y's are swimmers--straight body with one arm out doing a stroke...p's are swimming too, but they are just bobbing in the water...and my favorite, k's are kissing with the < being the lips doing the kissing.
I think there were more but I can't remember them all. I was just excited that someone finally gets my way of thinking. Or at least admits it out loud.

Roots Up, Roots Down

So, glory hallelulah, our house in Jersey sold!

We were sweating it when, days after the inspection, a tree fell down on the property and tore up the gas line and killed our air conditioning. The whole culdesac had to be evacuated. All I could think was, "Really? Really?!?" But after about a week of mulling it over, the buyers decided that they would still buy the house, after we got the landscaping and air conditioning fixed.

It wasn't easy to coordinate a clean up from NC, but the deal went through last Thurs. and we celebrated all weekend. Mainly by shopping at IKEA.

We know we are really lucky and blessed to have sold the house already. In Alabama, it took us almost a year. So now we are ready to really settle in here.

Dig me a hole and call me a tree. I'm not going anywhere else for a long time.