Eleven years ago, I had just brought home our Neena, and was getting ready for my mother to come visit and help out.
Of all my birthing experiences, hers was the most organized, and hence, the most enjoyable. I had the same doctor I had with Tritan (whom I loved), and we had her at the same hospital, so I knew what to expect. We had her induced, so we had the convenience of arranging for Tritan to stay with Aunt Lisa, packing everything we needed, and calmly arriving at the hospital ready for the day. It was so calm, in fact, that once we were settled in our room, Brian asked for a cot and a pillow and told me to wake him if I needed anything. So much for excitement!
Labor was pretty unremarkable, too. I had a wonderful nurse, who kept urging me to "just let it out" but I perfered to grunt and hold my breath when the contractions were too painful. By lunchtime, I was distracting myself with Party of Five reruns on TV. Soon after, the doctor broke my water, and the contractions really started coming hard. I'd given up the romantic notion of a "natural birth" with Tritan, so I didn't have any second thoughts about asking for an epidural. It worked wonderfully and the rest of my labor was, yes, actually sort of pleasant. I could feel my belly tighten, and the monitor next to me would show the spikes closer and closer together and I knew that soon we'd have our little girl. When I felt the pressure that means it's time to push, my doctor was in an emergency surgery--another mother had lost her child, and he was doing a DNC. Since I had the epidural, I simply waited for about a half hour, til he could come. When at last the moment came, there was a mirror set up so I could see (the only birth I've actually witnessed), Lisa had arrived with her camera, and Brian was rested and ready to cut the cord. It was beautiful and calm--what a joy to see her enter the world, wriggling and wet and bloody.
Her face was puffy and her head was flattened on one side--the result of sitting in the birthing canal while we waited for the doctor. And she was skinny--so skinny--and so long. I'll have to dig out my journal for her stats (Am I a bad mom that I don't carry their wieght and length around with me in my head? Sometimes I have to count back to make sure I remember the right year they were born!). She was so skinny, her skin wrinkled excessively when she made a face--she looked more like a withered old lady than a newborn baby. No, I wouldn't call her a pretty baby, but I've heard you have to have an ugly period somewhere in your life, and I recall being grateful she was an ugly baby, because she would undoubtly be a beauty the rest of her life.
The year before she was born was one of the hardest years we've had. Brian had finished a MIB, but despite constant interviews, was still in search of a job. He'd taken a job at a call-center to pay the bills, and we'd moved twice in the last 6 months trying to find an acceptable apartment we could afford (our first attempt landed us in the "Roach Motel"). I had a friable cervix with Athena which wasn't anything serious, but just meant I bled a lot with her. And I had what I know now was antepartum depression (but they were just realizing this existed when I had her); I would lose my keys and spend the rest of the day crying. The day I had Athena was one of the happiest of my life. Instantly, my hormones righted themselves, and I knew we would be ok. Brian had started working in Finance at the call-center and he flew to CA for 3 days most weeks. He was a natural at the job and enjoyed it. I loved being a mom of 2. With one child, I always had enough free time that I worried constantly if I shouldn't be working, too. With two children, I was always just busy enough to be happy to be at home with my kids, but not overwhelmed. Our new apartment landed us in a ward called Paradise Lane, which was Paradise for us. There were so many young families starting out, we made quick and lasting friendships. Her birth felt like a new beginning for me.
And I was right about Athena--she has grown into a lovely girl. She has really blossomed this year. She's not afraid to try anything--she took soccer camp this summer, ran for class office, signed Silent Night for the ward Christmas program, and taught herself how to knit and scrapbook. She tries hard to be better all the time. I repriminded her recently for not being grateful, and now I see her try hard to thank us for everything. She is a good example to me for trying new things and always trying to do better.
This year we went to an indoor water park to celebrate her birthday. We spent the day riding down slides, eating pizza, and trying to forget the winter chill. Athena even won herself a stuffed dog at the arcade.
This is how you dress to go to a water park in January.
Riding the waves
What a special story about a beautiful girl. Glad she is in our family.
ReplyDeleteYour birthday posts are the best. Big birthday hugs to Neena!
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday to your beautiful girl! I remember fond memories of Paradise Lane ward too. My favorite, by far and you were a great friend. I had no idea all of that was going on. Call me clueless.
ReplyDeleteGlad to have such a happy ending! Hope she had a great birthday.